To Rise Above Monsters, We Have to Abandon Our Humanity
by Moonbeam3926
Summary: Key Crescent is a young girl with a special gift. When orphaned, she is left with Hanji, who raises her at the Scouting Legion's Headquarters. Key grows up and even happens to reunite with a couple childhood friends. All seems well. However, a love triangle is produced, and she has no way out. She is torn between her two worlds and loves. What can she do? (OCxLeviXEren) 2 ENDINGS
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Say So Long to Innocence

Most people would believe the fairy tale "Little Red Riding Hood" to be a fictional classic, and nothing more than a worn-out book collecting dust on a bookshelf. I could understand why, but what if I told you it was so true that the Big Bad wolf lives inside us all? Well, he honestly does. Have you ever wanted something so badly, that you'd kill for it, or even die for it? The big bad wolf is always something different in everyone. For me, the wolf was more of a puppy that followed me around, constantly barking at me to do what it pleaded.

"Ow! Sister, how much more?" I whimpered past tears. "Just hold still a little while longer. You're doing great!" She gave me an empathetic smile. I knew it was empathy that laced her lips, for she had this same procedure done to her in previous years. A crescent moon sat happily on her right hand. While her hand simply smiled, mine cried and twitched in pain. I had just finished my initiation into the gang I was going into, and a member was carving into my skin while a frightened girl , who had curly, brown hair and eyes, sat next to me, awaiting her turn to be marked. She looked calm on the outside, but her eyes said otherwise.

"Hey, Maddie, it doesn't hurt that bad," I stated. She looked up into my eyes and nodded. We were both 10 at the time. On our first day of training 2 years ago, we were paired up and never left each other's side.

Our elder sisters had kept a secret. A big one. It was Society. This was a gang formed when our parents were still alive. Mami, my sister, was the leader. She decided on what choices and sacrifices we had to make to get our mission done. She also planned out our jobs and made sure everything was secure.

Maddie's sister, Adri, was second in command. She was in charge of getting the tools we needed to get our job done. Madison was heiress to that position, and I was to Mami's.

"There, Love. All done. See? There's not that much blood, either," she flashed a smile at me and went over to Madison to grab something.

She flinched when the now clean knife was brought to the top of her hand. I watched it pierce into her skin as she let out a whine. Both our hands trickled blood onto the floor. The blood we shed was a promise. Whoever joined society, was to give the gang their everything. Blood, heart, and soul.

Mami returned to me with some water and a chunk of gray gauze. She wrapped it around the wound carefully, but snugly. When the blood had been washed away, the scar on my left hand left a perfect moon.

Madison was done not long after me, and I watched Mami clean her hand. "Well, girls," Adri started, "Welcome to Society."

And that's the story of how I- Wait! I was supposed to tell you something important. What was it again? Shoot.

Oh, right! Right! I forgot to tell you why our gang was so important to us. Mami and the rest of us had a teensy, little secret. We weren't all that human. Especially Mami.

~time skip~

I skipped around in the grass by an old, giant oak tree where Mami, my older sister, and I always collected firewood. I plucked dead twigs up off the ground as I moved along. "Key! It's time to go, Love." I shifted my gaze towards her and slightly pouted by puffing out my cheeks. I hesitantly meandered over to her with slow, childish steps, grasping the scratchy firewood I had managed to collect in my scarred hand. The sticks were from pine trees, and the scent of vanilla and strawberries wafted up from them. It was such a shame we had to burn them. Their scent alone could make a whole room smell warm and cozy.

As soon as I reached Mami, I let her pet my long, blonde hair. Her hand was encased in the black gloves she always wore, so her cover would never be blown. I've only seen her without her gloves when she was in the kitchen, but other than that, her hands were always covered in the shadowy fabric.

It was breezy that day, so the wind scruffed up my hair and made it look like I hadn't brushed it in weeks. My hair was just so soft that it could only handle so much ruffling before it become nothing but knots and frizz. I beamed up at her with every drop of happiness I could squeeze out. She chuckled at the monstrosity my hair was and slipped my small hand in hers.

"We have to go back to work now," she sighed while tugging me along. I absolutely hated the bakery where Mami worked. Sure, it always smelt really yummy in there, but I couldn't have anything. It was practically torture. Trust me. If you were only 10, you'd want to stuff your face full of all the goodness that covered the counters and shelves. Mami was allowed to take home leftover bagels from the mornings, but that was it. I do have to admit, the job she had now was about a million times better than what she did at night to keep her and I alive. It wasn't exactly a godly thing you could say.

Her boss, , was always kind to us, though. She sometimes even let us have samples of the sweet treats and other goods she'd make that day.

Mami was very relieved to see that she took a liking to me. I would usually help out by scrubbing dishes, washing windows, or sweeping the crumb-coated floors. There was nothing to do during the day, so I had to either clean, help bake, or sit there bored out of my mind.

We walked past a cluster of vividly colored carnations. My lips twisted into a smile, and I let go of Mami's hand. "Huh?" She looked at me as I knelt down to the patch and picked up 5 different colored flowers. My long-sleeved, white dress billowed at the skirt and tickled my calves as I squatted in the prickly grass.I held the flowers in my free hand as Mami retook the other. We walked back in silence, but I was too happy to break the peace we established.

"Key!" called from the back of the bakery peppily. I could see her scruffy, gray hair pulled up into a messy bun from the back as we entered the bakery. "Come here and tell me if you like this, Cutie."

People who were very close to me would almost never called me by my first name, Key. They didn't see a reason why they would have to, so then why bother? They liked them, and so did I. Mami would always call me Love. That name was my favorite. Nobody else was allowed to call me that, and if they did, she'd probably kick them into next Tuesday.

My sister let go of my bandaged hand and walked over to put her apron on while shuffled up to , taking caution in not bumping into the fiery oven that had burning coals inside. She handed me a frail teaspoon full of a creamy, dark brown substance. "What are you waiting for?" She asked. "Pop it in your mouth."

I obliged and stuck it in, making a 'nom' sound as I closed my mouth around the spoon. A sweet taste spilled onto my tongue and my pupils grew in size from it. "Wow! What is this?" I questioned, looking up at her with my violet orbs.

She grinned proudly, "It's just some chocolate, but there's some fruit preserves in there. Pretty good, hmm?" She slid her hand across my head as she walked over to the oven to pull out some wheat bread that was sprinkled in a variety of grains. After setting it down, she took my spoon and dipped it back into the bowl full of chocolate frosting.

"Here. Go give some to your sister." She turned her head towards the door as the little customer bell jiggled. "Ah, Dr.Jäger! How can I help you?" She waddled over to the counter and helped a man who I didn't recognize. Standing next to him was a boy a couple inches taller than me with fluffy, brown hair and aquamarine eyes.

" , Good to see you," Dr.Jäger greeted, "I was wondering if I could poss-" I stopped listening in on their conversation and handed my sister the tiny spoon.

"What's this, Love?" she poked the spoon between her lips and her eyes popped open, "I really like that, but tell her she should put some salt in there. It'll make the flavor stand out."

I nodded and placed the dirty spoon in the sink. Dr.Jäger continued to converse with as I watched Eren rock back and forth on his feet, obviously bored out of his mind.

"I wish I had someone to play with," I whined, setting my head in my right hand. I almost set it down on my wounded one, but that wouldn't have felt really nice. "Don't worry, Love. Hanji is going to be here soon. The Scouts should be returning in a few hours." I swear Eren's ears perk up after Mami spoke. He began to look antsy and impatient.

"Ok, Mami," I sighed and got up from the little table where I was sitting, looking at the carnations I picked earlier. I forgot I set them there and walked over to the register, grabbing a teal one I picked especially for Mami. I tugged on her dress to make her turn around. When she did, I handed her the flower shakily. "Here, it's for your hair."

She looked like she was about to cry. Her breath hitched and she bent down so I could put the flower in her golden locks. The green stem entangled into her hair, and she stood back up again.

"So that's why you got those flowers," she giggled and grabbed a green carnation, sticking it between two knots of my hair. "Now you can look even prettier." I couldn't stop smiling. Nothing could make my happiness go away. That was until, he came.

"I appreciate this greatly. My wife was running low, and I knew you sold flour that wasn't ridiculously overpriced." Dr.Jäger said as he and his son walked out of the shop after saying their farewells.

Apparently, I didn't realize I was looking at eren when he walked out, and of course my sister had to notice. She leaned towards me and whispered, "Eren's pretty cute, huh?" I scoffed at her, "Ew! What? Boys are gross! No!" I folded my arms across my chest and puffed out a breath of air. All did was snort like a pig and go back to baking.

She called me to the back so I could make myself 'useful'. I watched intently as she taught me how to knead bread dough and measure out yeast. I learned how to bake cookies the other day, which was pretty fun. I always thought working in the bakery might be have the right path, but then Hanji came into my life. She always talked about her studies and battles with the Titans. How they would always be so unpredictable. How they would always slobber on her, and she thought they were giving her kisses. I thought it was amazing. That's not what made me want to enlist in the survey corps though. It was my curiosity. I wanted to know what was outside these blasted walls. What could have been our world without the monsters we called titans.

Members of Society were to carry out another job other than being a member. Mami worked in the bakery, Adri worked as a blacksmith, and others worked various jobs. That's what made us a society. We were all completely different, but we were a team.

A couple hours later, the familiar jingle of the customer bell clinked against the wood of the door, and the sound of combat boots was heard on the floor. I looked away from to see my idol, Hanji. "Mami, good to see you! How're you doing?" She walked over and grabbed Mami in a bear hug.

"Oof! G-good to see you, too. I'd be great if I could breathe," my sister whispered, straining to have just a bubble of air enter her lungs. Hanji always gave the best hugs. They were so tight and warm that you just never wanted her to let go. Unless she was strangling you. They weren't like Mami's though. They were still warm, but Mami didn't try to suffocate you.

"Hanji!" I squealed, skipping over to her. She wrapped me up in her arms and proceeded to squish me, "Aw! How's my little squirt?" I squealed and told us to be quiet. "How about we all go outside? We won't bother over here." Hanji sniggered as glared at her. They weren't exactly on friendly levels. I nodded cheerfully.

As she and Mami both walked outside with their hands holding mine tightly, I got a tingly feeling in my chest. It felt warm and fuzzy. it felt like you were calm and excited all at the same time. What was that feeling called again? Oh, right. Love.

The sun peaked over the giant brick walls of Rose as Mami and Hanji sat down. Meanwhile, I was gawking at Hanji's horse. "Wow! Hanji, you're so cool! You get to ride your horse everyday?" She lifted a finger, "Everyday except the weekends. That's when I get to do other stuff, like mess around with Shorty." I tilted my head to the right, "Who's Shor-" I was interrupted by a large thump on the ground. "Hah?" Everyone bounced off the floor into the air, only to fall right back on their butts.

Hanji quickly contained herself as she stared at the walls, her mouth wide open. "...N-no way. The wall is 100 meters tall. That's incredible." I rubbed the swollen bump on my head that I received from the scare and opened my eyes to see a terrified Mami. She backed away, her heart jumping out of her chest.

A large gust was rushed at us, blowing my white dress violently. The green ribbon tied around my waist fwapped against my skin harshly, ripping around in the wind. Hanji's horse, Ryner, spooked and kicked Mami in her back. A large snap resounded in the air as citizens frantically ran around. She screamed in pain as I ran over to her. "Sister? Sister, are you ok?" Hanji tried to calm Ryner down, yanking on his lead rope. Mami simply laid there, her breathing shallow. A stream of blood trickled from her lips. Tears were coming from her eyes. Alothough Mami did not move, her facial expression cried out in pain for her. She was limp to the touch. I touched her backside, crimson blood covering my fingers. Ryner had managed to kick her so hard, she fell and cut her back open. Since blood spilled from her lips, I assumed Ryner also crushed her lungs, and they were filling with blood.

She lifted my blood-stained finger to my cheek, smearing the gooey substance across it. She looked at peace at what she done. She couldn't speak anymore. She could no longer moving. Mami was at rest.

(Flashback)

"Well when things are in motion, they tend to stay in motion," Hanji explained to me from one of her previous visits. She swung her legs back and forth while I sat next to her. "Then when things are at rest, they tend to stay at rest." I nodded, "So when someone or something dies, that's why they don't wake up or move?" "Mhm! You're so smart!" She ruffled my hair and giggled to herself. I was only 7 at the time, but I was pretty smart. I had no common sense, but could grasp and hold onto information as if it was etched into my brain. "Ahh, I'd so take you on as my apprentice one day. That would truly be wonderful."

(Flashback end)

Mami's eyes glazed over. I shook her lifeless body a little. "Mami? Mami, wake up!" No response. I put my ear to her chest, hearing slow, unstable heartbeats. She was alive. Couldn't we save her? Hanji picked me up and plopped me down on her horse, swinging her leg over behind me. "No, wait! What about Mami?!" I cried. She took off, dodging citizens. Dead and alive.

I heard loud stomping. The ground was shaking below our feet. I looked up to see a large titan with rotten teeth and a crooked smirk approaching us from behind. Hanji easily avoided it, but it wasn't heading for us.I watched it raise a woman in the air and snap her in half. She laid lifelessly in its hands. That woman was Mami.

I couldn't bring myself to look away. "No...stop," my voice resounded in my hand. She was soon gliding her way down the monster's throat, coating herself in the gooey saliva that dribbled out of its mouth.

Hanji galloped out of the walls before they were shut, heading to somewhere outside of Shiganshina. The Garrison easily let her through while others struggled to be let out. Once everyone saw her pine green coat flapping in the wind, they all moved out of the way.

I didn't even realize I was crying. Mami was surely dead. Hanji was holding me down onto the saddle. My head was throbbing. We kept going like that until we reached a large castle over an hour away. Ryner huffed and puffed, and so did she. Her face plastered with uncertainty and was hinted with exhaustion. It was the first time I'd actually ever seen Hanji scared before.

She stopped her horse and sat there for a moment before burying her face into my tossled hair and going into hysterics. "I-I'm so sorry, Key!" she stuttered, "I couldn't save her! I couldn't save Mami!" She rocked me back in forth in her tight embrace. "I didn't mean for Ryner to freak out like that. He just got scared and...and I couldn't stop him. I'm such a bad soldier!"

Just hearing Hanji cry was enough to make my heart wrench. Before I knew it, I turned around in the saddle to hold Hanji. While her and I both cried, our noses runny and our eyes red and puffy, I rubbed her back soothingly. "I-it's *sniff* alright," I whispered, my voice cracking as I felt Hanji's breathing slow down. Her heart remained quick and steady, assuring me that she was alive and ok. But Mami wasn't. Mami was inside a beast's stomach, boiling in its acids.

She composed herself again, her eyes swollen from her scene. Nobody ever deserved to be sad and cry. Hanji definably didn't deserve it either. She was always so happy and cheerful. She shouldn't have had to seen Mami die, or rather hear it. Her body still and unmoving. Her heart dead and her empty shell of a body that no longer contained a conscience. A soul.

She wiped her clammy hands on her pants, brushing against her straps that hugged her thighs. She dismounted Ryner, and I followed suit. She gripped my hand securely for balance. I wasn't sure if it was to help me more than Hanji. I felt like if I let go, she'd just burst into tears again, and I would do anything to keep that from happening.

"What the hell is this?" A man with raven hair stared blankly at the sight of Hanji and I. She rubbed the back of her neck nervously. "Well, this is Mami Crescent's sister, Key. You've heard the news about the wall, correct? They started evacuating citizens onto boats, and I couldn't bring myself to put her on one. Corporal, I had to take her with me. I had to make sure she didn't die." Her voice never wavered, but it was flat. Dead. No emotion showed in it. It was...scary. No. Terrifying.

He pinched the bridge of his nose, "Ugh...so you bring her here? At a time like this? What the fuck is your problem?" She smiled slightly. That was the Hanji I knew, and squeezed her hand. She looked down at me.

"I consider her one of my best friends, Levi. Plus, I already had arrangements for her to come here. Don't you remember? 3 months ago I proposed she come and study here." Levi looked at her and sighed heavily, "Yea I do. Erwin said yes to the apprenticeship thing you had in mind, but only because she has potential." He turned to look at me and grimaced, "Just make sure that thing stays out if my sight. Always."

With that, he left the room in a hurry, strapping on large, metal boxes to his hips and stormed outside. I could see from the stable that he struggled to mount his horse, but once hecwas on, he was gone in an instant.

Hanji calmly walked down a large hallway filled with doors, gripping my hand tightly as if she were the one going to lose balance. She creaked a squeeky door open and looked around. "Here we are, Kiddo...Your new home."

Ryner huffed and puffed, and so did she. Her face plastered with uncertainty and was hinted with exhaustion. It was the first time I'd actually ever seen Hanji scared before.

She stopped her horse and sat there for a moment before burying her face into my tossled hair and going into hysterics. "I-I'm so sorry, Key!" she stuttered, "I couldn't save her! I couldn't save Mami!" She rocked me back in forth in her tight embrace. "I didn't mean for Ryner to freak out like that. He just got scared and...and I couldn't stop him. I'm such a bad soldier!"

Just hearing Hanji cry was enough to make my heart wrench. Before I knew it, I turned around in the saddle to hold Hanji. While her and I both cried, our noses runny and our eyes red and puffy, I rubbed her back soothingly. "I-it's *sniff* alright," I whispered, my voice cracking as I felt Hanji's breathing slow down. Her heart remained quick and steady, assuring me that she was alive and ok. But Mami wasn't. Mami was inside a beast's stomach, boiling in its acids.

She composed herself again, her eyes swollen from her scene. Nobody ever deserved to be sad and cry. Hanji definably didn't deserve it either. She was always so happy and cheerful. She shouldn't have had to seen Mami die, or rather hear it. Her body still and unmoving. Her heart dead and her empty shell of a body that no longer contained a conscience. A soul.

She wiped her clammy hands on her pants, brushing against her straps that hugged her thighs. She dismounted Ryner, and I followed suit. She gripped my hand securely for balance. I wasn't sure if it was to help me more than Hanji. I felt like if I let go, she'd just burst into tears again, and I would do anything to keep that from happening.

"What the hell is this?" A man with raven hair stared blankly at the sight of Hanji and I. She rubbed the back of her neck nervously. "Well, this is Mami Crescent's sister, Key. You've heard the news about the wall, correct? They started evacuating citizens onto boats, and I couldn't bring myself to put her on one. Corporal, I had to take her with me. I had to make sure she didn't die." Her voice never wavered, but it was flat. Dead. No emotion showed in it. It was...scary. No. Terrifying.

He pinched the bridge of his nose, "Ugh...so you bring her here? At a time like this? What the fuck is your problem?" She smiled slightly. That was the Hanji I knew, and squeezed her hand. She looked down at me.

"I consider her one of my best friends, Levi. Plus, I already had arrangements for her to come here. Don't you remember? 3 months ago I proposed she come and study here." Levi looked at her and sighed heavily, "Yea I do. Erwin said yes to the apprenticeship thing you had in mind, but only because she has potential." He turned to look at me and grimaced, "Just make sure that 'thing' stays out if my sight. Always."

With that, he left the room in a hurry, strapping on large, metal boxes to his hips and stormed outside. I could see from the window, despite my poor stature, that he struggled to mount his horse, but once he was on, he was gone in an instant.

Hanji calmly walked down a large hallway filled with doors, gripping my hand tightly as if she were the one going to lose balance. She creaked a squeaky door open and looked around. "Here we are, Kiddo...Your new home.


	2. Chapter 2

**(A/N: Hello there! :D Sorry if I have some mistakes and that I haven't updated in a while, but I had finals ,and I REALLY needed to study :P I'll actually be finishing this story, but if y'all harass me enough, I'll get chapters out much faster. I do enjoy positive criticism. I have a beta-reader, so I have one person's opinion before I upload. Forgive me if the story unravels too quickly, or its kinda gross a 15 year old likes a man twice her age, but that's how it is XD I HAD chapter 3 done already, but my computer glitched out and I lost it ;-; sad days, but I'll rewrite it soon enough. Should be done by Christmas. Anyways, enjoy lovelies!)**

Chapter 2

I don't want you to leave, will you hold my hand?

[Mami's POV]

I could feel the burning sensation in my back from where I was kicked. It didn't hurt as badly as I thought it would. All that was in my sight was Key. Her hair was tussled like it usually was, but she was crying. Why? I couldn't stand seeing her like that, and my heart wrenched at her image. Key. Where was Key?

I shifted a little to my right. I was sitting in something. It was hot and steamy like lava. My face was covered in the goop that my body was trapped in. I looked around, seeing hundreds of people lying in the broiling slop. Key couldn't have been in here. Hanji had saved her. Where was Hanji?

A few tears stung my eyes. This bastard of a beast had eaten me. It had eaten...its own kind. I slammed my fists against the walls of its stomach. "You son of a bitch! I need to see my sister!" After screaming that, I hacked up globs of blood. "I have to see *cough* Key!" My nails began to dig into the boiling flesh of the titan. It's inside felt like wet velvet. I soon began to feel my own skin heat . Jäger's gift was finally going to do something. I just hoped it was for the better. "S-shit," I cried, "Now it hurts. I thought being a magical girl meant no more pain…" Sadly, despair was imminent for magical girls everywhere.

[Key's POV]

Hanji managed to get me through the day, checking up on me every once in a while. She understood I needed to be alone. I didn't like when people would see me cry. It made me feel weak. Her face was smeared with pity , and I began to feel like a burden.

Supper rolled around, and I helped out by peeling potatoes. I couldn't get my mind off of Mami. Was she ok? No. She wasn't. She'd have to be a saint of some sort to survive having her spine broken and being gobbled down by a titan.

A tall man with platinum blonde hair strolled into the kitchen. He had bandages clinging to his arms and a big bruise planted on his forehead. He looked over at me and smiled, "You're Key, correct?" I nodded an gave him a tiny 'hmm' of assurance. "Yes," I started, "Are you Commander...umm?" My voice trailed off as I looked the other way. Dang it! Hanji told me his name earlier. What was it? "I'm Commander Erwin, sweetie," He chuckled and pet the top of my head when he finished grabbing a large, metal pot out of one of the cabinets in the kitchen. "Right. Thank you, sir."

I was about to finish peeling the last potato when the juices from it made the knife drag across my finger. "Ow!" I gasped as I let go off the knife, letting it make a 'clink' sound on the floor. I dropped the potato in my lap while silently cradling my index finger. Erwin turned around to take a few potatoes. He shook his head a couple times and lead me over to the sink where a pail of water sat next to it. He scooped a bit out and let it drizzle over the blood dribbling out of my cut. I winced a bit at the tingly feeling it gave off. "Sir?" I looked up at him, "Why are you being nice to me? I can clean it up. I promise." He furrowed his eyebrows slightly and finished cleaning my cut. "Because I know how much you've been through today."

A lot of the people Mami worked with weren't always as kind as he was. He was serious, but gentle. Mami's henchmen were kind of like that. A lot of them had tough lives from being abandoned to just roughing it out on the streets.

I nodded in response, looking at the giant, red bump that was planted on his forehead. "Did you fall?" I pulled up a little stool that was beside the sink with my foot and stepped up onto it. He was still a lot taller than me, but I soaked a rag in the water and held it up to his forehead. I had to stand on my tiptoes though. Being short sucked. "Here. Hold this on there for a bit. It will help the swelling go down."

He smiled, "Now why are _you_ being so nice?" I looked down at my shoes, "Well, aren't you always supposed to be kind to others? Even when they might not always be kind to you?" His smile widened some more. "I'll go get some bandages. Wait here." I jumped off of the step-stool and ran back to my room. It was down the corridor from the mess hall, so it didn't take long to bring the gauze to him.

"Key?" he asked quizzically before I left, "Why is your hand wrapped up like that?" Dang it. I looked down at my insignia, "I was out playing, but I scratched it on a tree branch." He seemed reluctant. "How's that possible? You're... pretty small. How did you get up the tree?" Let's see. How could I make this into something bad? Got it.

I gathered some tears in my eyes and held a balled fist to my mouth, "Y-you think I'm short, don't you?" I looked at him with big puppy dog eyes and he looked taken aback. "Oh! No no no! It's not bad. Short girls are pretty!"

His composure was crumbling down to rubble. This was why I was admitted into Society. I was valuable. I could turn any situation I was in into something totally different. I could get information out of anyone I wanted. On top of that, I knew I was cute. I was a little devil in disguise.

I let a few hot tears slide down my red cheeks, "You think so?" He nodded, "Of course. Actually, the lady I like is also sh-" when he was about to finish his sentence, a young soldier with strawberry-blonde hair walked in, saluting. "Commander, there's been a visitor requesting your presence." He sighed and shooed her off. "I'll be done in a moment, Ral. Key here is helping me out." She looked over at me, and I swear to Sina, I could see little twinkles sparkle in her eyes. I had a feeling she really liked kids.

She smiled from ear to ear and held out her arms for me to go to, "I'm Petra! So you're Key? Wow! You're so adorable! Aren't you Hanji's apprentice? You're my new roommate!" She rambled on and on. Alright. I think I liked this girl. She immediately shut her face as Short Ass walked in.

"What's with all this noise? It's giving me a headache." She straightened up and saluted again before leaving. My eyes followed her as she left. Levi stared at me with a blank face, his eyes half lidded as they usually were. "Don't you have somewhere to be?" He narrowed his eyes some more, and I scurried over to the stove and lit it. "Y-yes, Sir." With that, Shorty walked out of the kitchen and into the now busy mess hall.

The room contained heartbroken soldiers. Many of them had their eyes focused on nothing but the food in front of them. Some of them didn't even have their food yet. They looked so...sad. Scared...terrified even.

Once all the potatoes were done, I slowly walked out and sat down next to Hanji. She babbled on about the crazy day she had, but she never brought up Mami. Had she already told the others? What did they think? Did they think I was somehow lucky to even be sitting there breathing? Unharmed? Maybe not. They had been expecting me for a while now, so they must have assumed that I was who they thought I was. Some of them were even excited to see me.

Dinner was over fairly quickly. If Hanji hadn't been talking her face off, I'm sure it would have gone much slower. I distracted myself from the pained faces of soldiers with Hanji. Even though I could only hear the occasional coherent words spill from her mouth, I paid attention, but all through dinner, I thought about the others. How many of them died that day? They all had families that they would never say goodbye to. I was in the same position earlier. Why wasn't Mami leaving my head? Thoughts of her kept bombarding my mind.

After dinner, Hanji took me into her room and pulled out an oversized, white shirt. "It's not really my style, but it should work just fine for when you need to sleep."

I nodded, "Thank you, Hanji. Hey, can I ask you something?" She didn't bother to even look over her shoulder. "Sure, Squirt. What is it?" I hesitated for only a moment to form my words, "...What if I joined the scouts?" Her breath hitched and for once, became a little quieter. The room felt cold, my hands clammy. She turned around to face me and softly smiled, "I suppose I wouldn't mind. After all, that'd mean you get to come on expeditions with me. Why do you ask?"

"I just don't really know what I want to do when I grow up. That time is coming quickly. I don't know exactly when, but I know it'll be soon. I just want something I know will be a guarantee of making sure you don't go out there and get yourself killed..."

"Key," her smile faded as she approached me, "Joining the scouts is certain death. You do know that, don't you?" I nodded. "You'll either have your bones crushed into nothing but saw dust as pain consumes you, or your body melted into stew as many others fact is, you WILL die. Would you really want to accept that fate? Facing your mortality in such a way?" Her face was inches from mine and she gripped my arms for dear life.

I could feel her warm breath on my face. I could see the sincerity sparkling in her eyes, dying for a response to topple from my rosy lips. "I wouldn't mind," I simply said.

She let go of the sleeves of my dress instantly, standing back up quickly with a swoop of air hitting my face. "Glad to hear that." She let the shirt drop into my hands, and I hugged it to my chest. "I'm just glad you aren't planing to become a whore or something like that," she giggled. I gasped, "Hey! I didn't know that's what those ladies did at that building! They looked kinda pretty, like princesses! I didn't know it was a whore hou- Huh?"

She grabbed an end of my pine-green ribbon tied around my waist and tugged on it. It undid itself from there. As it dangled from Hanji's thumb and index finger , she turned me around, slipped it underneath my hair ,and tied it into a bow on the top of my head. "There! much better! We should get to bed kiddo." I nodded as I went down to my room, a candle lit in my hand. I swear, the ADHD of that woman was mind blowing.

Hot, steamy wax dripped from the light as I heard footsteps coming down from the other end of the corridor. I squinted to see who it was. It was a tall man who had some stubble on his chin and a slight smirk. He sniffed the air and stopped at me when we crossed paths.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and a warm breath on my neck. I acted quickly. Flipping him over onto his back, I slammed him down harshly into the ground. Wax dribbled down his cheek. "Sir, I don't mean to be nosy, but what were you doing?" He looked totally shocked. What? Haven't seen a 10 year old take down a full grown man before?

I got up from him and stuck out my hand, "Don't sniff me, alright? That's just rude." His eyes were still wide, but he took my hand as I helped him up. "Shit, how'd you get so strong?" I crossed my arms, "I don't sit around all day and drink alcohol like the Garrison. I move around a lot, so it wasn't hard for me to flip you. Plus, you're not that heavy. I've lifted heav-" I suddenly yawned and rubbed my swollen eyes lightly, "heavier."

"You should get to bed," he said. I looked up at him and nodded. I walked the rest of the way to my shared room and saw Petra snuggled up in her bed. I stayed silent and crawled up under the blankets. They smelt a little like bleach and a slight hint of lavender. Sister's scent was so much better. She smelt like coffee or any of the many other things she had made that day. It saddened me to know that I'd never get to see her again. Face buried in my pillow, I let my tears run onto my pillow. My hand was so cold. So empty. All I wanted was for someone to tightly hold it and tell me everything was going to be alright. Sadly, I knew that path was far from my reach.


	3. Chapter 3

(A/N: Hello everyone! Forgive me if there are mistakes still, but I try my best. I have to get these chapters out before people start looking at me uploading fan fiction O-O it's kinda awkward...Anyways, Merry Christmas! :D ) p.s I DO NOT OWN SHINGEKI NO KYOJIN

Chapter 3

I'm Still Here

"Hanji, I don't think you should get that close!" I whimpered, tugging on the hysterical girl's cloak. She merely laughed. "Nonsense! There's nothing to be afraid of!" After she said that, a rupturing boom clapped from inside her lab. Thick, ashy dust coated my blonde hair and Hanji's glasses.

"I mean…It is nonsense!" I giggled at her response. "You're ridiculous, Hanji, but," I hugged her tightly, "I still love you."

5 years had gone by. 5 gruesome, exhausting years. It happened in the blink of an eye. Would I ever change what happened? I wouldn't even dare. Who knows what possibilities there were going to be if I even stepped foot in a different timeline? That'd be hell.

Hanji shoved me towards my room to go get changed into normal clothes. It was Christmas Eve, so the scouts and I had the day off. Hanji still decided to do some last minute experimenting. "Don't forget to wear your bow! I want you to look pretty for Christmas!" she grined on my way out. "Like I ever forget it, Hanji!"

I found myself tugging on my usual white dress and black leggings. Pulling my thin, pine-green ribbon into a bow on top of my head, I walked out of my room into the hallway. It was brightly lit, and sweet scents wafted though the entrance of the mess hall. Snow continued to blanket the frozen ground outside. It made the air feel fresh and crisp once you stepped out onto the crunchy ice.

"Psst! Key, help me!" I turned my head towards a panicky Kayan. "What's up, girlie?" I responded back. "I forgot to go shopping, yes I did! What will I do? I cant keep cooking for everyone with this meager pantry supply! Please, you have to go out and buy some more groceries!" she pleaded, her hands set into a tense, praying position. I patted her shoulder and nodded. I understood why she was so jittery. She wanted everyone to have at least _some _dinner. I often had to go outside, pluck some sweet grass, and suck on that to sooth my hunger pangs.

"Alright. I'll go." I jogged outside towards the stables. I only had a pair of black ankle boots on, but they would have to do. All the shops would be closing very soon, and I had to get provisions before a blizzard rolled in. With a white cloak on, I hopped onto my horse, Himmel, and rode off. The sound of soft snow crunched under Himmel's hoofs as he galloped off towards the town square. My gloved hands numbed from the cold, and my cheeks glowed a bright red. I stuck my pink tongue out past my lips and caught a frozen flake of ice on it. I giggled at my childishness. I couldn't help it. I was forced into becoming an adult far too quickly. Plus, I was raised by Hanji, and that's just a whole bunch of disaster waiting to happen.

I trotted up to a store and looked inside. Closed. Poop. Luckily, the shop next to it was open and very vacant. It was perfect. I could walk in, get whatever Kayan wante- wait…what exactly did she want? She gave me $20 and no list? Eh, I just decided to get whatever.

I tied Himmel up to a tree, and left him out there. He looked down at the freezing ground and pawed at the fallen snow. His shiny, dark coat was speckled with dots of frosty water. Lifting the hood off of my head, I entered the cute, little shop. It smelt dry, but was warm and melted away the numbness.

I grabbed a few things off various shelves, even happening to slip a couple loaves of bread into my basket. While paying at the counter, I noticed something from the corner of my eye. A white cat ran through the laden square. Huffs of crystallized breath escaped its nose as it scurried its way though the illuminated snow.

"Miss? $18.74 please." I looked at the frustrated cashier, "Huh? O-oh! Right." I handed the clerk the money and turned my attention back towards the window. The cat vanished. I suppose that's what I deserved for irritating the poor cashier. Once everything was done and paid for, the man handed me a candy cane, "Merry Christmas." I smiled brightly and gently took the sugary treat from his hand. "You, too!"

As I rode home, I couldn't stop thinking about that cat. Poor thing must have been starving and cold. Heavy storm clouds filled the sky as wind ripped my clothes around. "Come on, Himmel. I'll get you inside!.…Ah!" I slipped on the wet ground bellow me and fell on my side. Snow flew around my form as I spotted pink eyes in front of my own. I screamed and flailed around, gagging on clumpy snow. Pain sparked up my body with each movement I made.

"Oi, Brat!" I looked up to see Shorty in front of me. He scoffed at me and picked me up in his arms. "What the hell are you doing out here? Do you want to get killed?" I shook my head furiously. "No, Sir!" he hummed in approval and set me down on my feet, then walked into headquarters. I blinked owlishly at the scenario that unraveled before me. "What… just happened?"

"Kayan, I gotta thank Heichou for saving me. What should I do?" I buried my face into the safety of my arms that laid lifelessly on my lap. "Well, you probably looked like a fool chocking on all of that snow, yes you did. Maybe the satisfaction of watching you struggle should have been thanks enough, huehuehue." I slammed my gloved palms down on the kitchen counter, "That's not funny, Kayan! I… really do want to say thank you. I just don't know how to."

She sighed hopelessly, "A simple 'thank you' should be enough. He's the captain, not a king." A creak in the wooden floors echoed throughout the room. "Oh? Really? What a shame. I thought you held me in high respect." Kayan and I shifted our gazes to none other than Levi himself.

She abruptly stood up, "Corporal, how long have you been here?" He simply shrugged and looked the other way, obviously not having a care in the world, "A couple minutes." Whoop. There went my stomach. I jumped up from my seat, pain shooting up my side. I miserably saluted. He waved it off. "Seriously, Key, we're in the kitchen. Don't abuse it." He walked over to the cupboards and pulled out two glasses. Filling one with water, he strode out of the room.

Kayan and I stood there, me holding my side and her sweating like a pig. She was probably scared to death. She was absolutely terrified of the corporal. "We should get back to work, Key. Key?" I focused my attention back onto her and slipped on an apron. "Yeah. Hey, I think I know how to thank the captain," I smiled, holding up a thin candy cane.

"KEY CRESCENT, GET YOUR KEISTER IN HERE!" I jumped ten feet in the air when I heard Hanji yelling from outside my room. I had barely got done cooking everything with Kayan, and I was absolutely exhausted. I just wanted to go to bed and be done with the day. I got up from my bed and slipped my dark gloves back on. I sighed heavily, my eyes droopy. When I stepped foot outside, Hanji gripped my wrist and zoomed down the hall outside. It was nighttime now, and a full moon sparkled in the shimmering sky. The world slept peacefully, ya know, except for everyone in HQ. When I stepped outside, I was immediately awake. Every scout in Headquarters was huddled in a large horseshoe outside. Captain Erwin stood at the head of the shape, and had a very serious look on his face. Levi stood by his side like the loyal dog he was. He didn't seem very interested in the whole ordeal, so he looked off to the side, still not giving a shit. "Oh look! I'm Levi and I'm too good for anything and everything. My one true love is the Windex bottle, but I'm secretly having an affair with it. I absolutely adore , too. Hur hur hur." I internally laughed at that image of Levi, and continued to stand in front of Erwin. Hanji squeezed in next to the other side of him and smiled cheerfully.

"Key Crescent, you have shown everyone around you," he gestured to the crowd, "so many accomplishments. From overcoming one of the biggest tragedies one can experience, to trudging through its thick dread and becoming one of us. So tonight, we want to award you for all your hard work, Cadet Crescent." Petra stepped forward and placed a cloak into my hands. It was soft and firm. Brand new. "We honor your bravery and sacrifice for humanity!" Everyone responded with a loud salute that thumped on their chests, "For humanity!"

I swung the cloak up and around my body and saluted back to them. Everyone cheered, except for Levi. He turned the other way and walked back off towards his room. "It's too damn cold to be out here for a brat like her," he mumbled to Hanji, who happened to be tearing up. "My baby is all grown up!" she sobbed. "I'm so proud of her!" Levi rolled his eyes and looked towards me. I was laughing and smiling with Oluo and Eld. I was so happy. I had everyone that I loved around me. Petra came close up behind my back and patted my back. We were now both the same height. Levi took notice of this. He started to accept that I actually changed quite a bit. I wasn't a little orphaned girl anymore that begged for a home. "I guess she has grown up, hmm?"

Once I got back inside, everyone huddled around and started to congratulate me. Hanji even came up to me and spoke softly as everyone quieted down, "I'm sure Mami would have been the proudest out of all of us, Key." It was so silent; you could hear crickets happily chirping into the night. "…I know Hanji. I'm sure she would have been."

Once everyone was in their beds and fast asleep, I slipped out of bed for the final time that night and took out a little something special. From that candy cane, Kayan and I whipped up a couple of cookies for Levi. It's not like I wanted to, but I really needed to say thank you to him.

As I walked up to his door, I could smell a heavy scent of whisky in the air. A tink of glass on glass was heard from n the other side of the door. I rose a hand to knock upon the door, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. What would I say? What would he say? Instead, I sat down upon the floor next to his door. It was chilly and hard. Not comfortable at all. The small plate of sweets laid on the floor next to me. I tried to fight off my weary eyes, but I couldn't do even that much. My head softly collided with the wall supporting me.

(3rd person)

Outside, Levi could hear a shift of a body. "Oi, who's there? I told everyone to leave me alone." No answer was given. He abruptly got up from his chair. "I said to leave me a-" He looked down at Key's sleeping form, her stomach rhythmically rising up and down. Soft breaths escaped her lips. He looked towards the small plate of desserts next to her, a card next to it. He crouched down next to her, a tuft of her honey-colored hair splashed across her face.

After reading the tiny card, he smiled slightly. "Too sweet for a brat," he whispered as he lifted her up gently in his arms for the second time that day. His feet met the floor as he carried the young 15 year old to her shared room. She shivered shakily from the cold. Levi 'tched', obviously annoyed. "So needy, too."

He laid her down on her sheets, and she happily curled up into a little ball, trying to conserve as much warmth as possible. His hands grazed her blushy cheek, the skin that lie there soft and smooth. Her lips twitched to a smile, so he immediately backed away slowly towards the door. "She's changed, hasn't she, Levi?" the man turned around to see Petra standing in the doorway. "All those years you completely ignored her, yet she went out of her way to risk telling you that she was still here."


	4. Chapter 4

(A/N: Hello! New chapter! This update took awhile longer because i made a cover photo for the story. Love you guys 3 feel free to review)

Chapter 4

Bitter, crisp white. That's all I could see for miles around. It was so pungent, like fresh paint, or bleach. It stung my throat when I inhaled it. While the scenery seamed to stretch for miles upon miles, there where actually tight walls to my side, packing me in. I moved forward, and as I walked on, the walls seamed to disappear. I picked up my lazy, heavy feet when I came across an extravagant staircase. The giant must have been at least several hundred feet tall. I ascended from my spot at the bottom of the beast. Each step I took left black blotches on ugly, pure painted floors. Strangely, this paint was dry as could be.

At first I took slow, easy steps, letting the white skirt of my dress sway back and forth. I loved how it's gentle tickles felt against the back of my thigh. After awhile, I began to jog up the grand giant. However, I never went any faster than a slow stroll. The faster I went, the longer the steps became.

It took me a while to reach the top of the room since it was so large. As I took my final step, an intricately locked door stood proudly in my way. I looked back at the trail of ragged, eager steps. My hands grazed over the black lock, a trail of white left from my touch. It was quite strange how with even the slightest contact with my skin, I could leave darkness pure, and white sinister.

There was no key to be found, but I continued to paint the lock. Once it was engulfed in white, it split in half with a loud crack and fell to the floor with a heavy clunk. I pushed the bleached door open a bit and peaked inside, adjusting to the new scene in front of me. With squinted eyes, I pushed myself inside.

Sparkling, fiery ashes floated in the air. They looked like snowflakes, yet these weren't as innocent as mere, frozen rain. A burning crust fell to the ground rapidly, I looked around, my eyes widening at every face I saw. Petra. Eld. Erwin. All dead. A tear streamed down my cheek as Hanji came into view. I covered my nose with my hand at the revolting stench wafting through the fiery air. A mighty scream ripped through the destruction. Two, large female titans were attacking each other furiously. I shook my head furiously, "It's just a bad dream, Key. All you have to do is wake up and it will all go away."

"It's a shame, isn't it? A perfectly good universe destroyed. However...it is quite beautiful. Don't you think? All this thick dread and despair ripping through the night?" I looked to my side, a snow-white creature by my feet, it's pink eyes staring into the evil abyss this world had become. "Hey, y-you're that cat! Well...cat-thing," I cut myself off. The creature had a cat body, with stubby legs and a long, bushy tail. Gold hoops hung around its floppy, white ears. The entity simply turned its gaze towards me, "Well, you're right on that part, but I wanted to let you know that you could stop the world from turning into this." Its voice was childish and smooth, never wavering while we spoke. It's piercing, vivid eye color stabbed daggers into me.

"I can? Please, I'd do anything!" It jumped up onto my shoulder. The white fur that engulfed its body was warm and soft, unlike my skin. The being got close to my face and happily smiled at me. It was then that I realized what the creature was asking of me. Madison had warned me of this. "Form a contract with me and become a magical girl!"

(Wake up time!)

I fluttered my eyes open. Hanji and Petra hovered over me, worry plastered all over their faces. "She's awake! Erwin! She's okay!" Petra cried and squeezed my cold body. "We were so scared, Key!" I gave her a strange look, "Yeah? What's wrong with sleeping, Pet?" Erwin came running into the room, his dirty, blonde hair tussled. I sat up a bit. I was swaddled in blankets galore. Looking around, I realized I was in the infirmary. What the hell was I doing in there?

Hanji moved a piece of my blonde hair behind my ear and spoke softly, "Key, when Petra came to wake you up this morning, you were freezing and your heart rate was very _very_ slow. So slow that you could have easily been dead, but about 3 minutes ago, it sped up. It was extremely scary. It was almost to the point where Petra could hear it from where she was sitting. So, how are you feeling right now?" She placed her palm against my forehead. I blinked owlishly at everyone, "I don't know…Fine, I guess."

Erwin sat down on the edge of my bed and patted my leg lightly, "You gave us quite a scare, Key. Take it easy today, alright?" I nodded and watched him walk out of the room. It felt so alien being conscious again. My body was lighter in this world. It wasn't burdened. At least while I was awake.

Petra and Hanji let me go outside to get some fresh air after doing nothing but tests all morning. Nurses had repeatedly poked and prodded at my body with sharp, pointy needles. I felt perfectly fine when I woke up, but now I was sore and bruised from all the needles.

I approached the stables and took a deep breath of the ancient wood the barn was made out of. The air crystallized around my mouth as I inhaled the icy air. It felt really nice to have the stinging sensation in my lungs after everything that happened that morning. My side still slightly hurt from my fall yesterday, but I was alright. I was breathing. My heart was working again. I was alive.

I laid down next to my horse."I don't get it, Himmel," I whispered to the big mound or horse laying on the floor beside me, "Why did my heart suddenly just go wack-a-doodle like that?" I looked towards the black equine, only to have him give a short snort out of his nose. "You're hopeless, Him," I giggled. Everybody knew that I would go out and personally talk to Himmel at least once a day, if not more. His name meant "Heaven" in German, which was kind of ironic. He absolutely hated every rider and horse in the entire Corps. He would either buck off his master ferociously, or get super irritated and not do anything, no matter how hard they beat him. It was okay though. He had a bad experience was all. Hanji made sure to tell me everything in explicit detail.

His former rider was actually a very big, bulky man. They were the bestest of buddies. Then one day, everyone was sent out on the 50th expedition. It was a simple mission, but sadly, it had some of the greatest casualties to have ever been recorded. Many lost their lives to that battle. People could actually smell the blood being spilled from inside the walls. The amount of death that reeked from the war was so strong and thick, you could probably still smell its wretched stench from the battlegrounds today.

Poor Himmel didn't make it back with his rider. He was plucked right out of his saddle. Once you lose someone that close, your whole world just shatters right before your eyes, and that's exactly what happened. He was taken back to headquarters. He often refused to eat or drink, and rebelled against anyone who came near him. Many people were bitten or kicked to the point that they needed serious medical attention. After so much attitude from the misunderstood being, he was to be shot and killed. However, I came along.

"Well, Key, it's time to pick out your horse. You get first pick," she winked at me. I was still fresh out of the Fall of Wall Maria, and my scar had only just finished healing. Tight, black gloves were slipped over my hands as I wrung them. I walked throughout the large stables, many of the horses neighing and pawing at their stalls. Before I knew it, I had reached the end of the extended building. However, in a dark, small corner sat a lonely stall. I approached it slowly. There stood a shadowy, depressed horse looking out a window. "Key?" Hanji questioned. My hand crept up to the horse's muzzle and stroked it softly. "Key?! Where are you? Huh?" She glanced towards me to see the dark horse licking my hand. I giggled softly at him, "I like this one." She gasped, ran, and stretched her hand outward to "save" me. Himmel took notice and chomped down on my insignia. He realized what he did and pulled away.

"Key! Are you alright?" I nodded and held my hand to my chest. Even though he bit me, I still had faith in him. Everyone else doubted this horse. This horse doubted everyone else, too, but he didn't doubt me. That's what I loved about Himmel. Soon enough, I was his new, bestest buddy. That just goes to show that even the most scarred people can love.

I shook that memory out of my mind. I loved that memory so much. It was one of the best ones I ever had. Himmel bumped me with his muzzle. Surprisingly, this big, tough guy required a lot of attention. I rolled on top of him and sighed, "I feel kinda drained. It's a pain. At least I have to-" I was interrupted by a white flash zipping through the stable's floor. Himmel noticed it, too. "Key!" a high-pitched voice yelled, "Key, help me!"

I got up off of Himmel. His stall was wide open, so I ran out with him. "Come on, boy," he trotted behind me. I saw his tack on the wooden wall, but I only grabbed his bridle and slipped it between his teeth. I jumped up onto him and took off. I had no idea where I was heading, but I had a feeling in my gut something was fishy.

As we galloped off into the woods, I could hear the voice growing louder and louder. It resounded in my head.. "Key, hurry!" I came to a clearing in the endless hoard of trees. I pushed Himmel a little further, but I spotted a girl tending to a flea-bitten gray horse out in the middle of the meadow. I slowed my horse down to a slow walk. The girl wore a black cloak, much like the one I had. I gripped Himmel's reins in my hands a little tighter. "Were you asking for help, Miss?" the girl just continued to pluck little bull-heads out of the animal's fuzzy fur. It was puffed up and fluffy from the weather. She finally turned to look at me and smiled, "It's been a while, hmm?" I gave her a funky look, "Eh?"

She took off the hood of her cloak, letting curly, brown ringlets fall onto her shoulder. "Hello, Key." "Maddie?"


End file.
